It’s time to call it a day, folks. I think I’m done with writing.
Now, before you get all, “you’re done with the blog?” on me, remember: I do believe there is a difference between writing and blogging. I am done writing; not blogging.
I received some bad news on Friday. You know my struggle with my laptop, right? Welp, it caused my performance to suffer as a News Desk Writer for FanSided and they told me I was out. It hurt, but I understood. And I’m okay with it. My editor told me to focus on the blog sites I’m a part of like The Sixer Sense and Sir Charles In Charge. I plan on doing that.
So, what do I mean when I say, I’m done writing? You’ll have to read my post on my thoughts about writing and blogging to understand where I’m going next. I’m done writing articles and stuff. I just don’t feel like that is where I want to be. I just joined my church’s newsletter team. As I said in the original post about it, I’m hoping to take on a more blogging role. If that’s not where the church wants to go, then I’m going to go sit down somewhere.
I guess I’m a professional writer is you think getting paid to write makes you a professional. Still, I would like to blog.
When I first learned I was out the door, I was angry. I was angry at my laptop. That was it. It was so frustrating. Here I am, looking to get paid so that I can get a new laptop. It’s a vicious cycle. Need a new laptop but the only way to get it is if the old crappy one works.
It’s been less than 24 hours since I learned of my fate. I’m still figuring my emotions out. But, this one event didn’t single-handedly cause me to give up writing. No, this was a long time coming. So then, this latest thing is a blessing in disguise. I can’t blame ALL of my failures on the laptop. Some of it was the quality of the content. I wasn’t writing right.
During this less than a month experiment (yup, I didn’t last through a month), I realized that I wasn’t that interested in writing. As I’ve said before, I am always trying out the many writing styles so I can get a taste. Welp, I’ve had my full of writing.
Right now, I’m at the FanSided blogs, the church newsletter, and DALANEL. Eventually, I will be down to just DALANEL. I know this much is true: The last thing to end my writing career will be DALANEL. When DALANEL is done, I’m done forever. I don’t see that in the near future though.
At this point, I’m no longer looking for writing gigs. And, if anybody wants me to write for their site, I’m going to have to respectfully decline. Again, we’re talking about writing; not blogging. But, I said “think” because perhaps one day I will go back to the writing field. Just not today. Or tomorrow. Or in the near future.
Less time writing means more time and devotion for this blog too so you guys win. And no, I wasn’t miserable when I was writing on the News Desk. I had fun, even if I never could perform. I know that if I had a fully functioning laptop, I would’ve easily been a better writer in their eyes. I don’t have to prove myself and this isn’t a career killer.
My editor told me areas that I can improve on and I accept them. You have to accept criticism in order to grow. Still, I’m just not willing to put in the needed effort to be a writer. It’s already not who I am, and I believe that if your heart is not in something, you will never perform as great as you can.
And, maybe that’s why I think I’m done writing. Because it’s not a part of me. I only want to do something if I know I’ll be giving it my all. Otherwise, you won’t be very happy doing it. At the first sign of trouble, you’re throwing in the towel. And I hate quitting something I started. But, that’s just me. I’m sure others are willing to do it and not be all in. Sometimes we have to.
In time, I will look back at this moment…this year…just dealing with the fact that I failed The Sixer Sense and low quality as FanSided.com and…I guess I have finally accepted my place in the world of words.
I like being my own boss at this blog. I like being able to write about what I want when I want. Sure, I’m not making any money off of it. But, sometimes money just ruins things.
Okay, I’ll end this like this: If/When I finally call it a day for blogging, it will be my terms or I’ll be dead. I refuse to let an outside force like the piece of crap laptop to stop me. I will stop because I want to. I got plans for this blog and I can see myself doing this for another 10 years. And, with the amazing growth this blog’s seen this year, in a decade, this blog should be a big name. We’ll see.