So, a little over a year ago, I wrote out a list of what I would like to have in a wife.

As I’ve said before, I’m probably going to die a virgin. That’s not a problem for me. There are also other reasons why I see myself single that will make this post too long. Another day. Now look, I’m not some guy with a clipboard standing in front of a bunch of women saying “Too hairy. Too fat. Not enough booty.” We all know what we want for a mate. We have to know if we’re compatible.

In a year, some things changed. It’ll probably change all the time. Anyway, here’s an updated list of what I would prefer my wife to be. On a recent Dante’s Opinion post, I talked about if men did have backups. Check that out. I guess I have backup criteria if this woman doesn’t exist.


You must be a Christian. This is probably the only thing that is not up for debate. She must have a great relationship with Jesus. She must be active in her church. She, above all else, must love the Lord God with all her heart. The success of our marriage rests on our individual relationships with God and for each other.

Nothing wrong with being wrong

They say women are always right. Eh…well…nah. Look, if she is right, then she is right. But, and I’ve seen this, if she still insists on being right and has been proven wrong, I just can’t be a part of it. If I am right, let me be right. If we’re in an argument, and I’m not the bad guy, don’t try to point me as the bad guy.

I never wonder why I’m single, FYI.

76ers/NBA fan

Yes, she’ll have to be a Philadelphia 76ers fan. A real fan. Like, she watches the games and cheers on the team. A true fan, she’ll have been supporting the team for quite some time. She knows all about the players and is really just a smart, knowledgeable fan. We’ll go to games together (she doesn’t have to write about them too), and raise our kids in the way of being a 76ers fan. It’s okay if she’s not a fan, but wants to be. At some point, somehow, she’ll know more about this team than I do. Haha not likely.

Age appropriate

I mean, she has to be around my age. A few years older/younger is my ideal range limit. So yeah ladies in their 30′s and older…sorry. And ladies who are minors…oh HECK NO. I ain’t going to jail. I’m a freak, for sure. But, I’m not that kind of freak.

Honest sense of humor

Look I’m a funny guy. I believe this. But, I am aware that some females will laugh at guy’s jokes to make him feel good. Some guys need that, I don’t. If you don’t think I’m funny, don’t laugh to make me feel good or to be nice. I’m not saying I’ll only go with a girl that finds me funny. I’m saying she needs to laugh when she needs to and roll her eyes when my jokes appear lame. Thanks boo. Of course, I’m a funny guy so she won’t even have to fake it. Speaking of faking it…nah, never mind.

Check out the original post. There’s only one difference.