Ah, family. I’m not very fond of the concept of family. I’m such a…well this is a PG rated blog so I’ll say jerk. I’m a jerk. But, I know family is important. Today’s theme is some family moments and stuff like that. Okay, here we go.

The family.  We were a strange little band of characters trudging through life sharing diseases and toothpaste, coveting one another’s desserts, hiding shampoo, borrowing money, locking each other out of our rooms, inflicting pain and kissing to heal it in the same instant, loving, laughing, defending, and trying to figure out the common thread that bound us all together. Erma Bombeck

Funny-Family-930

 

Those pillows are ugly.

At school, a boy is told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, and that this makes it very easy to blackmail them by saying, “I know the whole truth” even when you don’t know anything.

The boy decides to go home and try it out. As he is greeted by his mother at the front door he says, “I know the whole truth.” His mother quickly hands him $20 and says, “Just don’t tell your father.”

Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, “I know the whole truth.” The father promptly hands him $40 and says, “Please don’t say a word to your mother.”

Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day, when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy greets him by saying, “I know the whole truth.”

The mailman drops the mail, opens his arms and says, “Then come give your FATHER a big hug!”

Uh…why is the mailman the number one guy who the wife is cheating with? Did I miss something? Was there a decade of humping mailmen and cheating spouses or something?

Huh, this was a short post and I’ll tell you why. Well, actually, it’s a long story. So…I can promise this: I will do a family themed post again and it’ll have more content than this. I’m simply not able to do much today.

-DALANEL

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