You knew this themed post was coming. Shame on you if you didn’t. FOR SHAME. Haha I still love you. Before I start, I just want to say something important and serious. There are people that dread this holiday and Christmas. Mainly because they are alone. Be kind to a stranger today. Offer a smile. You don’t have to get up in somebody’s face like some freak. Just remember that this is one of the worst times of the year for some.
Okay, now, let’s get to the post.
Thanksgiving was never meant to be shut up in a single day. Robert Caspar Lintner
Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. 1 Thessalonians 5:18
We gotta survive, right? It’s just a shame that the turkey was picked as the bird, ya know? I have a transcript of what possibly happened that day:
A group of town leaders sit around a table. The candles are lit and the room is dim as it is close to evening.
Leader 1: Okay, gentlemen. We have all of the dishes ready. We need a main dish now.
Leader 2: Hm, what about chicken?
Leader 3: Not feeling that. I say duck.
Leader 1: (glaring at Leader 3) Are you mad, Johnson?
Leader 3: (holds up his hand is defense) Hey, we’re just brainstorming, here.
Just then, Tony the Turkey walks in.
Tony: (his eyes are lit with excitement) Hey guys, you’ll never guess what Harriet did this time. Her gown is just too long. She stumb…
Tony pauses as he notices weird stares coming from the town leaders.
Tony: Hey guys…is everything okay? Ya lookin at me weird.
Leader 1: (rising from his seat) Tony…(gestures to the kitchen) why don’t you talk about what Harriet did in the kitchen.
Tony: Sure thing, Paul.
The leader and Tony go into the kitchen. A few moments later, there are screams and gobbles and then sudden silence. Leader 1 emerges from the kitchen with a bloody shirt and bloody knife in his left hand.
Leader 1: Gentlemen, we have our bird.
So, that’s probably how Thanksgiving started. On with the rest of the post. A joke:
A turkey farmer was always experimenting with breeding the perfect turkey, specifically one with more legs to satisfy his family’s preference for dark meat. After many frustrating attempts, the farmer was telling his friends about his recent success.
“Well I finally did it! I bred a turkey that has six legs!”
His friends all asked the farmer how it tasted.
I don’t know,” said the farmer. “I never could catch the darn thing!”
Aw, man. Get a gun. Problem solved. Guns solve all of our problems, right? Right.
Okay, so, have a great day and thanks for reading.